The Eve Online 0.0 Experiment - Post 055 - War Party (Part 1)
As I sipped on my sparkling chianti with a hint of zesty lemon, I recalled that I had received several communications informing me of a vicious and crushing conflict that was taking place just 4 jumps south of empire space, in the heroic system 9UY4-H.
The system in question was owned by a group called "Ushra Khan", who I had been informed were "role-players" and were neutral towards all people who weren't Amarr...
Ushra Khan only owned one station in the game, and it was therefore very unfortunate for them that their home was being bitterly besieged.
They had enlisted the help of ISS, who I still needed to speak to about building a n00b haven in 0.0, and I had been informed that ISS were currently in 9UY4-H to help defend Ushra Khan from numerous rampant attackers of the most malicious order.
I also recalled that I owed a drink to a pilot who went by the name of "Smagd", and I had heard that he often frequented this particular station too. If I could just find a way to get to 9UY4-H with a designer beverage, I would be able to kill all three birds with one stone.
To my disappointment, every route I attempted to plot south from Heild involved a system of 0.5 security or higher.
Not wishing to go east into Great Wildlands and then south through Curse again, I decided to use my jump-clone in ASCN space for the very first time, and to pick up a bottle of their finest luxury Bollinger champagne while I was there, before then heading north to have a party with Smagd in the warzone, whilst learning from ISS about how to build a station...
A great sense of happiness overcame me once more, as I looked around to see my old friends in the love shack. Memories of those pleasant back-rubs and upper-class truffle hunt evenings came flooding back to me, and I suddenly had the urge to hop into the ASCN jacuzzi to apply a leg waxing strip to my moustache.
Fortunately for me, my old friend Suzimo then started handing out luxury cigars and sweet-tasting drinks, which promptly triggered the memory of the very reason I was there in the first place:
I was also given a buxom exotic dancer and quickly loaded both into my shuttle. I had been informed that the war was gathering pace, and like an athlete who had missed the beginning of his race by several hours, I was now running extremely late...
However, just as I was about to leave, and as is always the case when I am relaxing in the shamefully decadent systems of ASCN, I was casually invited to a secret location to inspect a 14-billion isk mothership...
I was informed that this gallant vessel was one of the rarest in the game, and that not many of these wonders existed.
The major alliances in EVE only had a few of these each, and some alliances only had one. I raised my hand in a stiff military salute to indicate my approval, and I then finally managed to begin my 33-jump journey northwards.
One jump later, this happened:
I had flown straight into a nasty and demoralising gate-camp.
What a disaster!
Within no time at all, they had mercilessly destroyed my shuttle and I was devastated to read the kill-mail, which stated that both the exotic dancer, and the little bottle of spiced wines that I was transporting to my friend had been violently destroyed.
I was absolutely livid:
I was so annoyed by this that I almost got out of my pod to walk up to him and smack him in the face.
However, I was pleased that I decided against this course of action, because I then realised that I was in space and there was no air....
(to be continued...)